Saturday, September 01, 2007

unraveling my mind so i can more clearly focus on my Doctrine reading

this week has been a whirlwind for me. early mornings (6:15!) and late nights with little or no breathing between. i'm not sure if this is a first-week thing or a rest-of-the-semester lifestyle. i'm hoping it's the former. reshaping my mentality is a rigorous activity. no more free evenings or joyously long lunches where i can revel in the goodness of a tomato sandwich. walking slow and not keeping a daily planner are such luxuries and i need to view them as such. that's what i'm in the business of doing right now: firmly bidding my summer goodbye and looking confidently ahead to the mountain in front of me. a mountain composed mostly of school textbooks, stubborn advisors, fluorescent lighting, class presentations, icy mornings, jarring relationships and my annoying overly analytical little mind. no looking back or living for the beautiful yesterdays. the future can be exciting and i know there is much to be learned and to grow from if only approached with the proper, open attitude. pray for my anxious spirit to settle into this place. i feel so discontent and flighty mostly all the time; ready to pack my bags at a moment's notice. but this is where i am right now. i need to get my heart here too.

i was flipping through my notebook today and came across a passage i had scribbled in varying sizes and fonts that made me smile: a joyful heart is good medicine. discontentment is a sickness sort of and the cure is a joyful heart. not joyful because it's saturday, not joyful because i have a perfect roomate, not joyful because i love my 4:00 class on wednesday and fridays or because it's raining right now but because i am a child of God and He is planning out my life step by step and knows exactly the reasons for each of my discouragements and heartbreaks and my painful minutes of utter confusion.

i need to stand on a rock.

-Kyrie

8 comments:

annie said...

i know a rock you can stand on--it's in psalm sixty-one.

linnea said...

kyrie, i sort of can relate to you. it's is really hard for me right now to adjust to a new schedule that includes WORK. . and not sleeping in and playing with ben all day.

. .

pray for me to settle too!

love ya

hannah said...

I feel ya kyrie! i'm anxious and kind of dreading startind classes tommorrow..but I know its all in God's hands! I will be praying for you. By the way i'm coming down next wednesday for a night!! I'm excited so hopefully i can go to some classes with either you or sienna. :)

sem said...

as i have been reminding myself a lot lately: "rejoice in the LORD; agian i say, REJOICE!"

how much we should be like solomon was after had tried everything else and found those things wanting . . . resolved to enjoy life - wherever the hand of the Almighty takes us.

i leave to CO on friday. chalice says you have thoughts of coming out west over spring break. you (and any of your friends) are welcome anytime - you hear me? ANYTIME!!! love you, dear one.

Charlotte said...

kyrie, I know i could just as well tell you this in person, but our meetings don't often afford the time to delve deeper than pleasantries. Anyway, I want to urge you to hold onto your Rock of joy, your armor, your love, the Law of God. what you've described in this post is something I still feel every time school begins (and into the year). from a senior, don't let your worried little mind overtake your resolve to stand on the rock. be stubborn. hold on. other things can fall by the wayside, really they can. but only be full of joy because of the assurances given to you in Scripture of the nature and activity of our God. they're all you need.

love Charlotte

todd and anna said...

Hey girls,

How are you??? Good to see you back. I hope to be back to blogging this month!!! I have been zo bad.

Love Anna

oh.no.its.jo. said...

well kyrie since we keep playing phone tag because of our different class schedules since i was already on here i thought i'd would teel you: just bear with me:)

these two weeks of classes have been ridiculous. last week between three classes i was given 3 papers to write by this week. i still have three left so that is why i am on this here computer.

figured it was just easier to put it on here since it kinda relates to your entry. kinda. anyway i will try and call you tomorrow after my class

love u woman.

funke said...

And some day you will turn in your last paper and assignment and realize that the mountain is behind you. And maybe you will have even gotten a degree out of it all.